I never thought on my wedding day that one day. One of us would die. It seemed like that was a world away. Yet, I talk with people so often that their husband, wife, or significant other has died. It has taught me to take moments, as much as I can and realize how much of a blessing life is with mine. I guess during the wedding I over looked this important aspect of life. Lost in focusing only on the celebration. You said it. We worry about the frivolous things.
I think at the funeral something is different. Grief changes things. The focus is eulogies and memories. Other things that don’t matter don’t matter quite so much.
I think I'm cynical or anxious or my work as a death doula colors my perspective...but I CONSTANTLY think about either me or my partner dying...and we aren't even married yet.. 🤣
I can understand cynical and anxious! I too think about death . . . maybe more than I should? But my work with the dying and the grieving also nudges me to remember that today I am alive. And that life is darn precious! Take care, Niki!!!
I love this perspective, and share it, to an extent! (But I can't deny the girlish part of me that adores the sweetness of funerals...as an attendee, not as an organizer who deals with the grumbling bride and groom!) I've attended plenty of funerals but I definitely find a lot more satisfaction in being part of the planning process for the reasons you listed.
I never thought on my wedding day that one day. One of us would die. It seemed like that was a world away. Yet, I talk with people so often that their husband, wife, or significant other has died. It has taught me to take moments, as much as I can and realize how much of a blessing life is with mine. I guess during the wedding I over looked this important aspect of life. Lost in focusing only on the celebration. You said it. We worry about the frivolous things.
I think at the funeral something is different. Grief changes things. The focus is eulogies and memories. Other things that don’t matter don’t matter quite so much.
I think I'm cynical or anxious or my work as a death doula colors my perspective...but I CONSTANTLY think about either me or my partner dying...and we aren't even married yet.. 🤣
I can understand cynical and anxious! I too think about death . . . maybe more than I should? But my work with the dying and the grieving also nudges me to remember that today I am alive. And that life is darn precious! Take care, Niki!!!
Wow! I couldn't have said it better - life is darn precious. But yeah I can definitely relate to the "think about death maybe more than I should.." !
Thanks for your comments, Benjamin.
I love this perspective, and share it, to an extent! (But I can't deny the girlish part of me that adores the sweetness of funerals...as an attendee, not as an organizer who deals with the grumbling bride and groom!) I've attended plenty of funerals but I definitely find a lot more satisfaction in being part of the planning process for the reasons you listed.
Niki . . . thanks for your comment!
You are funny!
I was a wedding photographer for over 30 yrs. And a nurse before that.
So many lessons and observations- you couldn’t be more on point with your opinion!
Thank you for all you do to help people with this journey.
We live in such a youth driven society- the subject of death, grief, sorrow almost seem taboo - until it happens to you.
And then thank heavens there are those like yourself who step in a guide… to shepherd the broken hearted through this uncharted territory. Thank you!
Well, at least randomly funny! Thanks for reading and commenting, Christine!